By James S. Gordon MD
During these joyous yet stressful holidays, we want to take a moment to stop and appreciate everything we have to be grateful for. At the top of our list is YOU — the people who make our work possible! As a thank you, we want to share with you one of our favorite stories, Empty Your Cup. Dr. Gordon often shares this story at our Mind-Body Medicine Training Programs. It’s a nice reminder to not allow the holidays to overwhelm you. So when the kids are screaming, and the line in the store is a mile long, and the cookies are burning in the oven, stop for a moment and take a few breaths. Breathe out the stress and breathe in the love that is the foundation of this season.
Happy holidays from all of us at The Center for Mind-Body Medicine!
By James S. Gordon, MD
Most self-help books emphasize will and action. From The Power of Positive Thinking to Skinny Bitch, they sound the same affirmative, even aggressive, bass note. Judith Orloff, a UCLA psychiatrist, appreciates the effort necessary for achievement and its satisfaction. In The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your Life, she balances this emphasis on doing with a deep understanding of being and the great, transformative blessings of acceptance. Power, she tells us, gains grace when we wear it lightly and peacefully welcome its limitations. It serves us best when we share it with others.
Recently, I was in Dharamsala, India, for a conference at the Tibetan Medical College sponsored by the Dalai Lama. While there, I had the opportunity to do a workshop for 200 teenage refugees who had just fled Tibet. I taught soft belly breathing, talked about fight or flight and stress responses, did shaking and dancing, and answered questions. The kids were, even in the large group, remarkably open about their difficulty sleeping and studying, the painful memories of loss, and their flight from Tibet. Afterward, the Tibetan physician Dr. Sonam Dolma, who headed up the conference, asked if there were any kids who wanted individual consultations with me. To her and my amazement 20 lined up; others, a bit discouraged by the length of the line, waited for me later.
This is the first in a series of treasures from our audio archives, classics and favorites that we think you’ll love.
Our founder and director, Dr. James Gordon, is a renowned raconteur. He has a seemingly inexhaustible supply of wise and funny stories that tend to illuminate key aspects of human nature, which he deploys throughout our trainings to call attention to the importance of self-awareness for healing. Empty Your Cup is a story he’s often told at our Mind-Body Medicine Professional Training Program. It’s become a staff favorite– a classic we hope you’ll enjoy it as much as we do.
The next day, before we leave, we spend time at the Foyer des Orphelins d’Haiti, an orphanage not far from the airport. The cramped gray-walled quarters, beds without mattresses, and, especially, the kids’ desperate need for attention and touch and anything else we might give, bring us all to tears or to that state in which we knew if we would but let them, they would come. There are 70 kids who live in the orphanage and 100 more who go to school there each day. Already, the principal tells us, 60% of the older kids who have participated in our groups, are calmer, more focused. We will, over the next few months, have 10-week-long small groups for all 170, and do whatever we can to help the orphanage’s caring, committed, and overwhelmed staff provide enough food and guidance so that these kids will have the best possible chance at life.
Jacmel, a seaside town famous for its crafts, is a three hour drive south across the mountains. At the side of the road are chickens, donkeys and the occasional stray dog, behind them banks of vegetables in stalls; overhead, blue, purple, pink, and orange flowers, and, beyond, ranks of mountains marching off toward the horizon.